There are few things I enjoy more than picking an argument with my wife when she has the hiccups.
"The question is not whether Ted Cruz is eligible under the US Constitution to be President. The question is whether he should be free to roam among us."
– Andy Borowitz
"It is only when you see a mosquito landing on your testicles that you come to realize that you can solve problems without using violence.”
The Bride kissed her father and placed something in his hand.
Everyone in the room was wondering what was given to the father by the bride. The father could feel the suspense in the air and all eyes were on him to divulge the secret and say something.
So he announced: "Ladies and Gentlemen, today is the luckiest day of my life." Then he raised his hands with what his daughter gave him and said, "My daughter has finally returned my Credit Card to me!!!"
The whole audience burst into laughter. But one was in complete silence…