Low Battery

•April 21, 2016 • 1 Comment

A man saved his girlfriend’s phone number on his mobile as ‘Low Battery’. Whenever she calls him, in his absence, his wife takes the phone and plugs it into the charger. Give that man a medal.

This Guy has Skill

•April 7, 2016 • Leave a Comment

Natural Born Citizen

•March 30, 2016 • 2 Comments

Those of you who worry about Democrats versus Republicans – relax: here is our real problem.

In a University of Minnesota classroom, they were discussing the qualifications to be President of the United States. It was pretty simple. The candidate must be a natural born citizen of at least 35 years of age.

However, one girl in the senior class immediately started in on how unfair it was of the requirement to be a natural born citizen. In short, her opinion was that this requirement prevented many capable individuals from becoming president.

The class was taking it in and letting her rant, and not many jaws hit the floor when she wrapped up her argument by stating, "What makes a natural born citizen any more qualified to lead this country than one born by C-section?"

Yep, these are the same kinds of 22-year-olds that are now voting in our elections.

Of course, I don’t know if any of this is true but it’s still funny irrespective of its authenticity.

Speeding

•March 30, 2016 • Leave a Comment

A State Trooper pulled an 87 year old woman over for speeding. As he looked at her driver’s license he was surprised to notice that attached to it was a conceal weapon permit. Taken aback, he couldn’t help but ask if she had a gun in her possession.

She replied in her crackly voice that she indeed did have a 45 automatic in her glove compartment.

The trooper then asked if she had any other weapons to which she replied that she also had a 9mm Glock in her center console.

The shocked trooper asked if that was all and the little old lady held up her purse and replied, "Well, I do keep a 38 special in my purse."

Finally the astonished trooper asked, "What are you afraid of?

The little old lady smiled and replied, "Not a freakin’ thing."

10 Things that will Never Fail You

•March 30, 2016 • Leave a Comment

Stick Figure Family

•March 29, 2016 • 1 Comment

Around town, it seems that many people like to put stick figures of their family, kids, and pets on the back windows of their cars. I, for one, never understood the need to do this. However, it is harmless so if it floats their boats, then more power to them.

While driving to work today, I finally saw one of the stick figure families that was the best answer I’ve ever run across to counter all the normal stick figure families.

Out the Wazoo

•March 12, 2016 • Leave a Comment

This is important stuff everyone should know. Everyone talks about “out the wazoo”. I never knew what one was. I suppose you probably didn’t know either. Well, lament no longer: I have the answer to this life-long burning question.

This link will take you to a page where there is a guy who actually sells wazoos for a living (you can make a living doing that? Wow!). If you click on the Wazoo link, it’ll take you to a page where there is a short video explaining all about wazoos. You need to watch this if, for no other reason, to round out your education.

http://www.kazoos.com/store/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=KK&Product_Code=WAZOO&Category_Code=WAZ

Note: I have no financial connections with this guy whatsoever. I just thought this was so funny that it had to be shared.

 
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