Arab Dog versus Israeli Dog

The Israelis and Arabs realized that, if they continued fighting, they would someday end up destroying the whole world. So they decided to settle their dispute with an ancient practice: a duel of two, like David and Goliath. This "duel" would be a dog fight.

The negotiators agreed each side would take 5 years to develop the best fighting dog they could. The dog that won the fight would earn its people the right to rule the disputed areas. The losing side would have to lay down its arms for good.

The Arabs found the biggest, meanest Dobermans and Rottweilers in the world. They bred them together and then crossed their offspring with the meanest Siberian wolves.

They selected only the biggest, strongest puppy of each litter, fed it the best food and killed all the other puppies. They used steroids and trainers in their quest for the perfect killing machine. After the 5 years were up, they had a dog that needed steel prison bars on its cage. Only expert trainers could handle this incredibly nasty and ferocious beast.

When the day of the big dog-fight finally arrived, the Israelis showed up with a very strange-looking animal, a Dachshund that was 10 feet long!

Everyone at the dogfight arena felt sorry for the Israelis. No one there seriously thought this weird, odd-looking animal stood any chance against the growling beast over in the Arab camp. All the bookies took one look and predicted that the Arab dog would win in less than a minute.

As the cages were opened, the Dachshund slowly waddled toward the center of the ring.

The Arab dog leaped from its cage and charged the giant wiener-dog.

As he got to within an inch of the Israeli dog, the Dachshund opened its jaws and swallowed the Arab beast whole in one bite. There was nothing left but a small puff of fur from the Arab killer dog’s tail floating to the ground.

The stunned crowd of international observers, bookies, and media personnel let out a collective gasp of disbelief and surprise.

The Arabs approached the Israelis, muttering and shaking their heads in disbelief. "We do not understand," said their leader, "Our top scientists and breeders worked for 5 long years with the meanest, biggest Dobermans, Rottweilers and Siberian wolves, and they developed an incredible killing machine of a dog!"

The Israelis replied. "Well, for 5 years, we have had a team of Jewish plastic surgeons from Boca Raton working to make an alligator look like a Dachshund."

~ by yougottobekidding on July 29, 2014.

5 Responses to “Arab Dog versus Israeli Dog”

  1. Not politically correct for a dog rescue person but….. funny all the same.

    • I have had one or two dogs with me all my life. I love ’em dearly; wouldn’t be without one around. This was not by any stretch of the imagination a dig on dogs (if you’ll excuse my pun). It was just funny in an unexpected way (well, at least IMHO).

  2. I was hoping they would rush out into the arena and become friends. Enough viciousness and deceit.

    • One would hope that, after thousands of years of civilization, we could settle our differences in a more mature manner. Unfortunately, the “might makes right” philosophy just seems to be in our nature. Can you imagine what the world could be like if we, as members of the human race, expended our energies to improve mankind’s lot rather than seeking to obliterate one another?

  3. Hysterical! Thanks for sharing!

    From: You Got to be Kidding’s Blog Reply-To: You Got to be Kidding’s Blog Date: Tuesday, July 29, 2014 10:37 AM To: Subject: [New post] Arab Dog versus Israeli Dog

    WordPress.com yougottobekidding posted: “The Israelis and Arabs realized that, if they continued fighting, they would someday end up destroying the whole world. So they decided to settle their dispute with an ancient practice: a duel of two, like David and Goliath. This “duel” would be”

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