Modern Insults

I researched your entire family tree and it seems you were the sap.
You are so old, even your memory is in black and white.
Ever since I saw you in your family tree, I’ve wanted to cut it down.

You’re a person of rare intelligence. It’s rare when you show any.
I used to think that you were a big pain in the neck. Now I have a much lower opinion of you.
I heard your parents took you to a dog show and you won.

You fear success, but really have nothing to worry about.
You are proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.
Brains aren’t everything. In fact in your case they’re nothing.

Don’t you need a license to be that ugly?
I look into your eyes and get the feeling someone else is driving.
I love what you’ve done with your hair. How did you get it to come out of one nostril like that?

In the battle of wits, you’re an unarmed man.
Moonlight becomes you — total darkness even more.

~ by yougottobekidding on September 25, 2013.

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