You Work in Corporate America if…
– You sat at the same desk for 4 years and worked for three different companies.
– Your company welcome sign is attached with Velcro.
– Your resume is on a thumb drive in your pocket.
– Your company logo on your badge is applied with stick-um.
– You order your business cards in "half orders" instead of whole boxes.
– When someone asks about what you do for a living, you lie.
– You get really excited about a 2% pay raise.
– You learn about your layoff on CNN.
– Your biggest loss from a system crash is that you lose your best jokes.
– You sit in a cubicle smaller than your bedroom closet.
– Salaries of the members on the Executive Board are higher than all the Third World countries’ annual budgets combined.
– You think lunch is just a meeting to which you drive.
– It’s dark when you drive to and from work.
– Fun is when issues are assigned to someone else.
– Communication is something your group is having problems with.
– You see a good looking person and know they’re a visitor.
– Free food left over from meetings is your main staple of your diet.
– Weekends are those days your significant other makes you stay home.
– Art involves a white board.
– You’re already late on the assignment you just got.